We know that when we want to make a point we can raise our voices, make extravagant gestures or move closer to the person we are talking to. When a cat wants to make a point they have to think outside of the box. When the cat eliminates outside of the litter box or sprays an upright surface to mark it, they are emphasizing what is on their minds.
Depending on how much the cat is loved they are either tossed out the door, never to be allowed to live in the house again or they are put in a crate and brought to the veterinarian. The vet will do tests, including checking if the cat has a bladder or kidney infection or a urinary blockage, to determine that the cat does not have a life threatening malady. Next the vet will ask the cat's guardian the personal questions, “Did you move the kitty litter pan? Did you buy a new type of litter? Did you buy a new style of litter pan? Do you need a new litter pan?
When those questions generate no solution the vet determines the cat has a behavioral problem. The number one reason cats are euthanized for behavioral problems is for eliminating outside of the box or for marking.
What a tragedy of missed communication on our part. The motivational speaker, Anthony Robbins maintains, “We must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.”
What we took as inappropriate behavior was instinctively perfect communication by the cat.
The cat being territorial by nature must assert both their identity to other cats through the scent of their urine or feces and make us aware that they are frustrated and angry that their turf has been invaded or changed. Appreciating routine the cat will become upset when new animals, people or objects (furniture) invade their space. It is quite common for cats to eliminate on the guardians bed when a new partner moves into the house. This is not a bad cat but a cat who is worried that there will not be enough love to go around.
We do not speak catise and the cat does not speak English but we must be perceptive to the cat's actions to communicate with them. The management guru, Peter Drucker said, “The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said.”
The stray cats we pick-up do not come with a guide book. Even when we adopt from a shelter we receive literature on what and when to feed the cat and a calender to schedule vaccinations but no language book.
We would not think of raising our children without a copy of Dr. Spock; we must not consider raising our cat without a handbook on their behavior.
We have for too long been told that cats are too mysterious to be understood or that that they are independent, aloof, loners that do want our attention.
Actually, cats are closer to us emotionally than any other companion animal. Like us they are complex beings that want to be loved, and appreciated on their terms in their space and time frame.
When we pause to “listen” to the cat's behavior we come closer to understanding their actions. The founder of Toastmasters International Ralph Smedley once said, “Understanding is the way to peace.” Communication is the way to harmony in the home with cat(s).
